A different Christmas

It's actually a bit comical if you contrast these pictures with our family photo at the top. We took that picture back in October in Mission Beach in San Diego. Now here we are dealing with Northwest weather. This is the first Christmas in a way-long time that we've had snow, that is actually lived in it. The first pictures of our house are nice snow. That was when the snow was fun. Now it's melting and pretty messy. Notice the picture with the pool toys scattered in the snow. Don't really need those here. The top right photo is our street which was tricky to navigate for awhile. The bottom photos are pics of family gatherings at Christmas. That's my immediate family, proud of 'em and a big reason we moved up here. The bottom left photo shows our 30 + gathering on Christmas day. The only photo I couldn't manage to upload is the classic family photo standing around the snowman. I managed to save that picture onto the internal card of my camera and can't find the cord yet! Any ways, just wanted to let you all see how things are going up here. Much love to you all!

Prop 8

For all you Californians out there, we all know Prop 8 passed. I consider this a victory for traditional marriage and for what God considers best in regards to sexual relationships. That all sounds neat and tidy until you talk to a person struggling with not only homosexuality, but also how they reconcile that with their Christian faith. Below is a response I received from a good friend. His response is real, heartfelt and needs to be addressed in the church. I'm having lunch with him soon and hope we can continue our friendship and the conversation on this very important topic. Please let me know how you would respond to this, thanks.

"Now that 8 has passed maybe the church can go after the real causes of the destruction of the family like divorce, adultery, child abuse & neglect etc... It is fine to be against gay marriage but the church is never happy until they single out certain sectors of society. Gays are treated like lepers and stereotyped by pastors as fruity, evil people. The hypocrisy is mind boggling. Where is the constitutional amendment to ban divorce? Homosexuals make up a very small percentage of the population and yet are blamed by the religious right for everything. When is the church going to wake up? I go to bed lonely every night. Is that the solution? Christians have decided to prioritize sin and the worst thing you can possibly be is a fag. Even gay people who are not acting upon their "condition" like me are not welcome. It just really bums me out."

Election mayhem

Even though I didn't vote for Obama, I'm posting a picture of him here because I now believe it is my job (and everyone else's who didn't vote for him) to support him, pray for him and know that God will use any president in our country. I also found this great list of things to keep in mind no matter who our president is. Enjoy.
1. God is still Father, Christ is still at His right hand, and the Holy Spirit is still abroad in the world, recreating that world according to the image of Christ. When the nations conspire against Him, He laughs at them.

2. The most important thing we can do for our nation, and for the world around us, is to gather for worship every Lord's Day. The privilege of voting in presidential elections comes to us every four years, while we are graced with the opportunity to take the Lord's Supper week to week. Right worship reforms the Church, and is therefore God's central instrument for remaking the world. For this reason, we must insist on worship that is in accordance with Scripture. Judgment begins with the household of God. Our generation is fatherless. In the power of the Spirit, in the name of the Son, we must therefore worship the Father.

3. The first and greatest command is to love God, and the second is to love our neighbor. When the question arises, as it will, as to who is our neighbor, a good policy is to always begin with the smallest, the least, the most defenseless. Never apologize for a crawl-over-broken-glass pro-life stance. Live in such a life-affirming way as to expect apologies from those who would redefine the lives of others (always the lives of others, isn't it?) into expendible insignificance.

4. Honor women. Honor your mother, your wife, and your daughters. We live in a culture that despises women, and which has engineered a vast machinery of propaganda designed to get them to surrender to it. If you don't know how to honor, on a day-to-day basis, the women in your life, then learn. Make it a priority.

5. Don't doubt in the dark what you knew in the light. The late Francis Schaeffer taught evangelical Christians to think like Christians as they engaged with unbelief in the public square. But a goodly number of his proteges, disciples, and name-appropriators have begun to "engage with the culture" in a way that looks more like going native than it looks like missionary work. Melancthons fall apart more rapidly than they used to. Get used to it, but don't you do it.

6. While pro-life work is at the very center of all mercy ministry, it should not be allowed to distract from the broader kind of mercy ministry that offers gospel help to those who have contributed to their own misery -- addicts, convicts, the uneducated and the unemployable. Such mercy ministry must be consistently tenderhearted and hardheaded. Sentimentalists are never able to give themselves away in the ongoing way that bleeding (but thinking) Christians must.

7. Learn something about economics. Please.

8. Cultivate a godly sense of proportion. My family, living in the UK, are encountering evangelical Christians who think that "lack of socialized medicine" is just as bad as abortion-on-demand, because in both cases people are dying. This is as wrong-headed as it is possible to get, even for evangelicals, and on two counts. In the first place, deliberate murder cannot be compared to well-intentioned negligence or incomptence. In the second place, to the extent that we do attack death-dealing incompetence -- as we must -- we must begin by attacking the species of incompetence that lets people die after many months on waiting lists because some people don't like accurate pricing mechanisms. Water won't run uphill just because you can arrange for three bishops to say "Trinitarian" or "incarnational" over it.

9. Count the cost. Freedom of expression is part of our Christian heritage, and one of the things we are fighting for is the right to that expression. We cannot lose the tree and keep the fruit of it. When the laws come, as they will, prohibiting (for example) condemnation of homosexual behavior, then count the cost. And the very next Sunday, start your sermon series on the sins of sodomy. The first message should provide the introduction, and allow the congregation to count the cost as well. They might want a heads up -- some of them might think it prudent to head over to a more docile church, one with a kennel-fed pastor. Whenever the state yanks on his lead, he always heels, and then waits expectantly for his treat. A much more sensitive and sensible ministry, don't you think?

10. Fight in the culture wars as those who gladly serve the triune God of heaven. We are not dogs fighting over a piece of meat, and we must never allow the surly or shrill attitudes of the self-righteous to creep into anything we do. We must be puritan cavaliers, and merry warriors. Fight like a regenerate D'Artagnan, and not like a thug with a Bible he stole from the motel, or a like prim and censorious Miss Grundy, she of the pursed lips. We are Christians, not wowswers.

If you want to keep your friends...

Don't know if you've seen this video yet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LPG25Wf0aa4
but it's pretty thought provoking to say the least. This is a huge election for our country and state. Sometimes I think that here in California, Prop. 8 is as big of a deal as who gets to be our next president.

Let me know what you think. Let's get some dialog going.

Big changes

Here you have it, my "Surf Pastors" dream. If you look closely, not only is this guy carving this left, but in the background there is a church. This great photo from Shane Peel was taken in the Batu Batu Islands, Sumatra, Indonesia. Even the name sounds exotic. I'm guessing that most surfers would love to have the time and money to travel the world and surf relatively uninhabited breaks like this. I've had the pleasure of living in Hawaii, surfing in Oahu, Maui and Kauai. I've also surfed at different breaks all the way down to Cabo San Lucas on the Baja peninsula. Even good old San Diego isn't half bad for warm-ish water great surf.

I found this photo on the cover of The Surfers Journal, volume 14, number 3. I have been blessed over the years with a great friendship with Skip Frye who not only attended our church for years, but also served unselfishly in many areas. For years, every other month, I'd meet Skip at his shop, have some great conversation and prayer time and he'd bless me with the latest issue of TSJ. When I saw this cover, my eyes immediately went to the wave and surfer, but under later examination discovered the church in the background. I still love surfing, still love pastoring, but both of those activities will change significantly in my life real soon.

After over a year of prayer and reflection, we will be moving up to Washington state. The biggest draw for me is my family who all live within about 45 minutes of each other. I'm ready to spend the second half of my life around my siblings, their kids (and their spouses) and my parents. I can't wait to raise my children around the godly influence of my family. I'm praying about my next ministry/pastor position and when and where that will happen. Meantime I'll be looking for work that will support my family during this transition.

And regarding the surf in Washington state, yes, there is plenty. In the latest issue of TSJ, there is a great article on cold water surfing and the advances in wetsuit technology. Needless to say, I'll be investing in a thicker wetsuit with an attached hood, booties and gloves. In this article, the author was saying that a real surfer has to check his/her true motivation, dedication and desire when they move to a place with cold water. Well, after surfing cold water in northern California for 4 years, I'm ready to test my mettle in even colder water in the Northwest.

It's a new adventure and one that we're praying is full of many great benefits we can't even image. I'm ready to start this next chapter of my life and am extremely grateful for the 30 years I've had to live in California and Hawaii. Bring on the cold!

Directional weekend

What a great and important weekend I just spent in Portland. Not only did I get to hang out with Karl and Marc, two great friends, but God also gave me some more clarification as to what we'll be doing next.

We attended a weekend conference at www.hofcc.org and got to see a family integrated church action. We also got to spend quality time with their leadership. I now know that the next phase of my ministry will be in a church similar to this. Now we're praying about where (Washington or San Diego) and how (start a new church or get involved with an existing one) that has the same core values.

Diaper cowboy

These are the images you love from childhood. It's when see your kid running around in a diaper with the cowboy boots on and just hope you can get them to stand still long enough to snap a photo.

Remember the classic scene from Parenthood, where Rick Moranis' kid is practicing his flash-card times tables and Steve Martin's kid has a bucket over his head and running into a wall? Darn it if I didn't miss that opportunity this morning. LilyAnna, my 1 1/2 year old, had a green beach bucket on her head and kept bumping into things. Kelley said, "We should take a picture" but we missed it. The joys in parenting are usually the moments that come and go so quick, you didn't have time to take a picture.

Big Wednesday, good fun

Another classic "Skip work and surf day" with the Bus club. On the second Wed. of August a bunch of us from Orange County, LA and San Diego meet at San Onofre to surf, hang out, eat and basically make pretend we are surf bums for the day. Lots of good surf and fun for the day. The picture of the right was a gift from Zachary, my 12 year old and his rendition of the day.

If you click on the photo on the left you can see an enlarged view. That's my bus on the far left, next to the old RV. If you click on Zach's picture you can see a close up of his art and little ol' me on the waves.

The reluctant surfer

I'm sure this is just the beginning of LilyAnna wanting to try things her big brothers do. She insisted on trying on Micah's wetsuit but quickly found it to be just a little too much. I barely had time to snap these photos before she started crying. Certainly makes for some cute shots though!

Boss/employee relationships

One of the funniest and actually most painful things about the Dilbert comic strip is the "pointy haired boss". He's so incompetent, it's ridiculous.

Some of you may have a boss like that or did at some point. What does the Bible have to say about all this? We took at look at boss/employee relationships in church on Sunday. I'd love to hear your thoughts and feedback on the whole workplace environment from a Christian perspective.

Here are my notes if you'd like to read through them before commenting.

The Pastoral Epistles, 1 Timothy 6:1-2
Intro….Bad bosses… Dilbert, the Pointy Haired Boss…
How many of you have ever had to deal with a difficult boss?

Text: 1 Timothy 6:1-2

What's the deal here? Is Paul promoting slavery? Is the Bible backwards in its teaching? I thought we were all past slavery in our country…

Let's talk about the "slave" culture/issue as mentioned in the Bible:
In patriarchal times certain members of the household were "bond-servants" and others were members of the family.
Family members had different rights and privileges than bondservants, the greatest being family members were heirs of the estate but the bondservants had no entitlement to it.
Under the Mosaic law, Israelites could not be taken as bondservants, but those of Gentile nations could be. (Leviticus 25:44)
Those Israelites who were taken into a household as hired servants were assured of gaining their liberty in the year of jubilee and they had the right of redemption - that is, they could pay money to gain freedom again.
An Israelite could voluntarily choose to become a hired servant for his entire life.
The Bible condemns abuses against bondservants in the most emphatic terms (Leviticus 25:53) but it does not explicitly condemn the practice of a householder having servants.

On to the NT…Anyone who mistreated servants was soundly condemned in the writings of the Paul.
About half the population of the Roman Empire in the first century was composed of slaves. Several times in the NT we read of the conversion and baptism of entire households (Acts 16:15; 1Cor 1:16). So there were many Christian slaves at that time.
Not all Christian slaves had "believing masters." But those who did were not to show any less respect for them.
Instead, they were to serve them even better, realizing that they were setting a good example for and benefiting their brothers in Christ.
In earlier societies, these "class distinctions" were more marked. Wealthy landowners had their own servants.
At the time of Paul's writing to Timothy (before unemployment insurance, social security and Medicare)- it was not necessarily a disadvantage to be a bondservant to a wealthy landlord.
If the landlord was benevolent, he provided for his servants, looking after them even into their old age and in times of illness.
Many of the parables of Jesus are based on such a relationship between the "Goodman of the house" and the servants in his charge. (Luke 12:41-48; 14:15-24; 15:17-19; 16:1-13; 19:12-27; 20:9-16)
1 Cor. 7:21, Titus 2:9-10 and Philemon 1:10-17

In the culture of this new church in Ephesus, there was a great social and legal gap between masters and slaves.
However, as Christians masters and slaves became spiritual equals, they also became brothers and sisters in Christ. (Galatians 3:28)

Paul is actually affirming this master/slave relationship and is now giving guidelines for Christian slaves and masters.
In the same way, Paul's counsel can apply to us today in our working situations.
Employees should work hard, knowing that ultimately they are working for God, showing respect for their employers.

Likewise, employers should be fair and good (Eph. 6:5-9, Col. 3:22-4:15).
Our work needs to reflect our faithfulness to and love for Christ, just like our relationship with our families, our neighbors, where we volunteer, clubs or organizations we're a part of.
We need to be known for our love, for others and for Jesus.
For us today in our culture…every society has different classes. Even we have and upper, middle and lower class.
We may travel "first class" in the better seats at the front of the plane, some of us can afford full time nannies. House cleaners, landscapers…

Let's say you are in a lousy job situation.
Obviously if it's detrimental to your sanity or health or safety, you may need to look for another job.
However, if it's bare-able, think of the great example you can be, especially to the other Christians who work there who also recognize how bad things many be.

My summer working at KCDA….I "hated" the job (really a lack of maturity on my part) and Kevin Waiters "loved" the job.
He always set such a good example for me. However, I couldn't see it because I wasn't willing to look at the bigger picture.

Conclusion:
"God has revealed a system by which freedom will be granted to all that believe and obey, not simply a freedom from the oppression of one's fellowman, but a greater freedom. We have the hope of being freed from the curse of sin and death, being granted eternal life in God's Kingdom."
God has intervened in the course of history to provide deliverance from slavery, really any sin we become a slave to. GOSPEL
"One of the great ironies of the human experience is that most men, when given the choice between slavery to sin and freedom in Christ, choose slavery, slavery to the exercise of the passions of the flesh rather than to the will of God."

Beach Baptisms

This video says it all...

Soaking in the Word

Last Sunday I preached on 1 Tim. 4:6-16. Basically, the passage gives the answer to the problem of those who have wondered away from the faith, stay immersed in the word of God!

What has been your experiences in trying to help others come back to the truth when they've wondered? I know it sounds good in theory (that we all just come back to the Bible when confused), but it isn't always that simple. Stubborn humans that we are, we don't always take the easiest path back to God.

The Message
You've been raised on the Message of the faith and have followed sound teaching. Now pass on this counsel to the Christians there, and you'll be a good servant of Jesus. Stay clear of silly stories that get dressed up as religion. Exercise daily in God—no spiritual flabbiness, please! Workouts in the gymnasium are useful, but a disciplined life in God is far more so, making you fit both today and forever. You can count on this. Take it to heart. This is why we've thrown ourselves into this venture so totally. We're banking on the living God, Savior of all men and women, especially believers.
Get the word out. Teach all these things. And don't let anyone put you down because you're young. Teach believers with your life: by word, by demeanor, by love, by faith, by integrity. Stay at your post reading Scripture, giving counsel, teaching. And that special gift of ministry you were given when the leaders of the church laid hands on you and prayed—keep that dusted off and in use.
Cultivate these things. Immerse yourself in them. The people will all see you mature right before their eyes! Keep a firm grasp on both your character and your teaching. Don't be diverted. Just keep at it. Both you and those who hear you will experience salvation.

Men in leadership, part two.

This week's post is really just a follow-up from last weeks. I'll post my sermon notes here in case you'd like to comment on leadership in the church, how God has set it all up etc.

The Pastoral Epistles, 1 Timothy 3:8-16

Intro…Discussion in our home fellowship on the whole ordination, license, title deal with leaders in the church…
· Both last week and this week we are focusing on the men in the church. Good timing with Father’s Day…and remember, these are great qualities for all men to be striving for.

Text: 1 Timothy 3:8-16

Last week we looked at the qualifications for the elder, overseer, or bishops within the church. These are the men who provide the spiritual leadership in the church. The pastors are included in this group.

Today we continue on with qualifications for the deacons in the church.
· Deacon means “servant” or “minister”.
· Originally deacons were helpers of the elders. As a result, their qualifications were practically the same as the elders.
· This office of deacon originated in Jerusalem, (Acts 6:1-6, Phil. 1:1)
· “Deacon” is also used throughout the NT in an unofficial sense for anyone who serves.

Now that we’ve defined deacon and know where it originated we can look at the qualifications for the deacons. (and again, most of these are self-explanatory)
· Worth of respect
· Sincere
· Not indulging in much wine (doesn’t get drunk….”person” at Ty’s party last week with beer…”I guess I can’t be an elder….”)
· Not pursuing dishonest gain (a leader in the church for all the right reasons.)
· “Keep hold of the deep truths (mystery) of the faith with a clear conscience” Be able to speak Biblical truth in an increasingly “tolerant” world that is more concerned with being “PC” then it is speaking the truth in love. The secret of salvation through Jesus Christ, which is revealed by the Holy Spirit to all who will believe. Today the word mystery implies knowledge withheld; in the Bible it indicates truth revealed.
· V. 10 Able to be tested…Before men were accepted as deacons they had to prove themselves before the community. Then they could serve as deacons, "if there is nothing against them."
· And that’s the way elders and deacons are still chosen today, men who have proven themselves before the community of believers.



The first six had more to do with the individual, these next two have to do with his family.
· Having wives that are worthy of respect, not malicious talkers, but temperate and trustworthy. A deacon should be leading his family in a way that helps his wife be a woman of respect, trustworthy etc.
· Ideally if women had husbands they respected spiritually and/or fathers who set a great example for them, then they probably wouldn’t wrestle or struggle with the leadership of men in the church.
· I know that’s not always the case though, yet the leadership of men in the church is evident here in all of chapter 3.
· V. 12 (If married) A committed family man who manages his family and household well. It’s because it all starts in the home…

The reward for being a deacon?
· V. 13 “Gaining an excellent standing and great assurance in their faith in Christ Jesus.”
· Basically that means “honored by God”. IOW, if God is pleased with your service as a deacon, then that’s all that matters.
· You’ll also gain respect from people in the church.

v. 14 Paul reminds Timothy that even though he can’t be there in person, this is how the people ought to conduct themselves in God’s household, the church.
· Remember, “church” is “ekklesia” meaning, “called out ones”. We are called out of our former lifestyle into a life that honors God.
· Paul reminds us that it is the “church of the living God, the pillar and foundation of truth.”
· The truth that is revealed in God's Word. The meaning of this clause is well expressed by Lock: "Each local Church has it in its power to support and strengthen the truth by its witness to the faith and by the lives of its members."

(One of the jobs of the elders and deacons is to communicate…) The mystery of godliness. V. 16
· “The revealed secret of true religion, the mystery of Christianity, the Person of Christ."
· Let’s take a look at this statement: This is foundational, a credal statement: “He appeared in a body, was vindicated by the Spirit, was seen by the angels, was preached among the nations, was believed on in the world, and was taken up in glory.”
· If you break this down it’s talking about: “Jesus, his deity justified, watched over by angels during his earthly ministry, he was preached after his death among the nations (literally “the gentiles”), not as a theory or a creed but as a person (“We preach Christ” 1 Cor. 1:23), the true preaching of Christ produces faith in him on the part of many hearers, Jesus ascended into heaven, the climax of his earthly ministry.
· The church and it’s leadership should be all about Jesus.
· Preaching Christ means preaching his life, death, resurrection, and ascension as the glorified Lord. GOSPEL

We’ve looked at the leadership structure of the church.
· God, Christ, Man, Woman
· Elder, Deacon, team leaders, ministry area leaders etc.


Conclusion: Reader article on arm wrestling champion who is not only super strong, but a godly man.

Elders

Ahh, the lovable duffus, Homer Simpson. It's painfully funny to watch that show. I have to admit that "The Simpson's" does a good job at forcing us to take a look at how we live and act as Christians. However, as I focused on the qualifications of elders in the church, I used Homer as an example of what men should not be. For better or worse, he is committed to his wife and kids.

But when we look at the unattainable list in 1 Timothy 3:1-7, every man realizes the daunting task of trying to live up to the Biblical standard for our lives. I'd love to hear your take on this passage, especially you men and how you are doing in measuring up to the standards listed in 1 Timothy 3.

More on women's roles in the church

Here is part two of my sermon series on women and their roles in the church. I'd love to hear what you think.


The Pastoral Epistles 1 Timothy 2:9-15
The role of women in the church (A two part series, part two.)

Intro…Pendulum swing…finding the middle balance….respected scholarly research on both sides of the “women speaking in church” issue.
We had a lively discussion in our home fellowship last week on this topic…and that was in a small group!
Initially I was all excited to continue on with the thought process/thesis from last week which was: “Women should be allowed to preach and teach in the church, under the blessing, guidance and authority of the men elders/pastor in the church.”
This week my thesis is: “Scripture seems to indicate that Paul is forbidding women from filling the office or role of pastor or teacher in the church/public worship gatherings. Paul also forbids women from exercising any type of authority over men in the church assembly, since God has called men as elders in the church.
I did a lot of reading again this week on this subject….and there is respected biblical research on both sides of this issue.

I think both arguments are valid. I want to do my best to present both sides well, so you can decide.

Also, please check these out for further reference:
http://www.equip.org/site/c.muI1LaMNJrE/b.2634597/k.C59E/DW252.htm
http://www.irvingbible.org/fileadmin/pdf/special_sections/women_ministry/women_ministry_IBC.pdf

Text: I Corinthians 11:3-12, I Corinthians 14:32-36
Some important points for today’s thesis:
There is order in God’s creation that still applies today, (I Co. 11:3) The head of every man is Christ, the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
(1 Cor. 11:8) Woman came from man and was created for her.
Yet we need each other, v. 11-12.

In reading a passage like 1 Cor. 11:3-12, it seems to say that women are a disgrace if they come to church without a head covering and they might as well be bald or go home and shave their heads!
So either we at Coastlands are in direct violation of scripture (in many ways, men praying or prophesying with a hat on?...v. 14 Long hair a disgrace to men? ) or we have recognized what that what those things meant in first century Corinth, they do not mean today in San Diego, Ca.
What is Paul getting at here? Let’s look at the original audience he was writing to.
Pagan and Jewish women who became Christians were given a place of honor and dignity, unprecedented in their former lives.
Jesus and Paul liberated women. They had women friends. Women served in the church and worshiped alongside men.
In Judaism, women were segregated in the synagogue and resigned to the women’s court in the Temple. They couldn’t even learn the Torah. The ritual for entry into Judaism was circumcision.
Along comes Christianity with a radical social statement which was that the ritual for entrance into Christianity is baptism, for both men and women!

Yet in today’s passage it seems like Paul is taking a step backwards.
In chapter 11-14 Paul discusses public worship, (for both men and women) and what you should and shouldn’t do.
The theme here is ORDER. Orderliness in worship, teaching these new Christians how to behave properly in worship.
1 Cor. 14:26- 33 (In regards to public worship) Everything that happens needs to be done for the strengthening of the church and done in order, ”For God is not a God of disorder but of peace.” 1 Cor. 14:33 & 40
Paul first speaks to the women who were most likely taking their freedom to extremes, throwing off the customary veil or head covering which represented propriety, modesty and graciousness.

So how does that apply to today, what is the timeless principle?
We all need to be orderly in the worship service. A key way a Christian women today “cover their heads” is when they behave appropriately with modesty, graciousness and (if married) marital fidelity.
Take a look again at verse 5. Paul is talking about women praying and prophesying in public worship. They just need to make sure they do it in the proper way, that is recognizing the order of creation and the male leadership God set over the church, as we saw in verse 3.
This is a “problem passage” because it seems to contradict what Paul says later in 14:34-36
Seems pretty clear, huh? Coincides with 1 Tim. 2:11-12, “I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, she must be silent.”
So, in today’s reading of these passages one can easily assume that Paul is saying the women should not be in a preaching or teaching role when there are men in the audience or congregation.
I think it’s ridiculous to say that women can never say a thing in church. (Remember 1 Cor. 11:5)
Paul is still reprimanding the Corinthian church because their services were chaotic and disorderly. They were putting too much emphasis on tongues, which was getting out of control.
Apparently some women were getting a little crazy with their new found freedom in Christ.
Paul is calling women to reverence, graciousness, and an attitude which does not call attention to ones self.

Here is some important things to remember on this topic:
God created both man and woman in His image. He offers the same Holy Spirit to both men and women at salvation. The same spiritual gifts are available to both men and women for service.
Jesus was completely radical in how he elevated women in his day. He ignored cultural barriers and invited women to be part of his ministry. Throughout the Bible we found God using women as leaders, prophets and teachers to further his kingdom.
He did, however, choose only men to be his disciples/apostles.

If you search both the Old and New Testaments for every reference to any kind of speaking ministry or leadership position carried out by women, you will come up with nearly 100 references.
“This is all the more remarkable in view of the fact that there are but two or three references which seem to be against women’s audible ministry. Yet these few references have been made the basis for muzzling women in spite of the fact that the main thrust of Scripture is against such silencing.”

“We need to acknowledge once again the difficulties associated with any scriptural study of the role of women in the New Testament church. It is a complex subject with great scholarship and godliness on both sides of the issue, and all who undertake to draw conclusions and set policy with regard to it must, in our view, do so with humility and openness to continued learning. This indeed is our commitment—never to conclude our perusal of God’s word on this subject as if we have determined God’s mind on the matter definitively for all times and peoples. Rather, we will continue to study God’s word and seek to be led by His Spirit in this and all other matters, praying always for the courage and integrity to implement whatever He shows us through that process.”

Conclusion:
I’ve presented two sides to the discussion in the last two Sunday’s, so you have to factor in what I said last week with today.
What I’m asking you to do (as you should do with every sermon you hear) is to search the scriptures, commentaries, books written etc. and see what God is telling you.
I personally am leaning towards women using their full giftedness in the church, under the blessing, guidance and authority of the men elders.

Women's roles in the church

On Sunday I preached the first half of a two week sermon series on women's roles in the church. I will post the sermon notes here and would love to hear your thoughts. My basic thesis for this series is that while it seems to be evident that God has relegated the roles of elder to men, there is room for gifted women to preach and teach in the church, under the authority and blessing of the men who are leaders in the church.

The Pastoral Epistles 1 Timothy 2:9-15
The role of women in the church (A two part series)

Intro… Who are these well know women Bible teachers?
Recent Beth Moore Conference…a great teacher who acknowledged that she was “under” the men there…
When we think of women teaching in the church, we need to remember that the spiritual gifts mentioned in the Bible are given to all Christians.
Does God only give the gifts of teaching and preaching to men? Obviously not, (Beth Moore etc.)
So the question is, how does a woman use those gifts in line with what the Bible teaches?
There are three classic “problem” passages on this topic, I Corinthians 11:3-12, I Corinthians 14:32-36 and I Timothy 2:8-11.

When reading these passages, it’s good to keep in mind:
The accounts of creation and the fall (Genesis 1-3) reveal a fundamental equality between men and women (as far as their standing before God and need for forgiveness.)
Women exercised significant ministry roles of teaching and leading with God’s blessing in both Old and New Testaments.
Though the role of women was historically limited, the progress of revelation indicates an ethic in progress leading to full freedom for women to exercise their giftedness in the local church.
Key New Testament passages restricting women’s roles were culturally and historically specific, not universal principles for all time and places.
Though women are free to use all of their giftedness in teaching and leading in the church, the role of elder is biblically relegated to men and women come under that leadership of the men in the church.

(Today we’ll look at 1 Timothy 2:9-15. Next wk. the 1 Cor. Passages.)
Text: 1 Timothy 2:9-15
As usual, my sermon notes will be available both on our weekly email and the church website.
I also encourage you to look at: (and I will be quoting from)
http://www.irvingbible.org/fileadmin/pdf/special_sections/women_ministry/women_ministry_IBC.pdf

Isn’t it interesting that we tend to ignore or skip over the other verses and hone in on v. 12?
v. 8 What about men lifting up holy hands? (I talked about that last week, and still 99% of men in church today don’t do this!)
v. 9 What is the definition of a woman dressing modestly, in our culture or others, especially tribal cultures?
What if a woman comes to church with an “elaborate” hairstyle like braids? Who decides what an elaborate hairstyle is? Gold or pearl jewelry?
Who defines what “expensive clothes” are?

Why do we allow such “hideous” behavior from women in church today?
Because in our culture, these things do not speak of impropriety. Obviously in Ephesus they did. We allow the culture to impact our interpretation. We do so with the intent of understanding Paul’s true meaning.

In light of that, v. 9-10 don’t need to be that hard to understand or interpret.
It’s always a good idea for women to dress modestly and decently.
A woman’s beauty should come from within, good deeds, things that are “appropriate for women who profess to worship God.”

But then it gets a little more tricky and specific, v. 11-12

When interpreting these passages, it is important that we follow settled hermeneutical principles:
We must always consider the context. (What was going on at the time that would affect the writing?)
We must look behind local situations to find universal, timeless principles.
(Lev. 19:27-28, “don’t trim the edges of your beards or sideburns…or get
tattoo’s”…not relevant, but the principle still applies, that is, don’t identify
yourself with the pagan culture.)
We must realize that Paul sometimes accommodated the culture he was trying to reach in order not to be a stumbling block to their salvation. For example, Paul instructed Timothy to be circumcised in I Corinthians 9:19-22. This was unnecessary but prudent to reach the people for Christ.
We must always interpret unclear passages in light of clear passages. (And interpret scripture in light of scripture.)

So, when we look at this passage in 1 Timothy, let’s consider the context. What was going on at the time that would cause Paul to write this?
Ephesus was the capital of the Roman province of Asia and was the greatest
commercial center in Western Asia Minor. In this rich, cosmopolitan city, Greek and Asian cultures
were inextricably mixed. Under the Roman emperors it became the local center for the imperial cult--but far more important to the life of the city was the temple of Artemis. It was the largest structure in the Hellenistic world and one of the seven wonders of the ancient world. This temple and its cult affected every aspect of the society and was the focus of fierce civic pride. For a whole month each year the city stopped work and devoted itself to the Artemis cult. (Acts 19:23-41)
The goddess herself was depicted with many breasts, a symbol of fertility. Her worship was overseen
by eunuch priests. Under them were male and female priests who were attended by thousands of
young women. The church Timothy was pastoring was in the shadow of this great temple and was
certainly affected by its cultic worship in which women and eunuchs played the major role.


Remember, back in chapter 1, vs. 3-4…
Over and over in the letter Paul exhorts Timothy to focus on sound doctrine and beware of false teaching. (1:19,20; 4:1-3, 11-16; 5:20; 6:3-5, 20,21)
Timothy’s major problem was unqualified teachers. If men were teaching in error, we can surely suspect that women reared in Artemis worship would also be causing problems. Their lack of scriptural education was making the problem worse.
In vs. 11 Paul wants these women to learn properly…and “unlearn” the corruption from the temple of Artemis.
“In quietness and full submission” is the sign of any good student.
Our Bible time at home…constantly helping them learn in quietness
“Not to teach” most likely refers to false teaching in the church but there is no indication that this is referring to a formal pulpit situation.
Some have taken this statement out of context and flatly denied women the freedom to teach men.
Such an interpretation forgets that there is a difference between teaching “over” a man and teaching “with, to, or under the authority” of a man, and that if women can never teach men than we have some major contradictions in the Scriptures (and in the home where wives teach, correct, and challenge their children and their husbands).
It would be ridiculous to say that Kelley has never taught me anything or pointed out something I needed to see. She is my “helpmate” right from Gen. 2:18
In the church at Corinth women both prayed and prophesied (proclaimed) the Word of God. (1 Cor. 11:5) It was not a question of whether they should be free to teach men, but how, and under what circumstances.
Remember, Christians in Ephesus met in small house churches and false
teaching spread easily in these settings.
It is also important to note that the verb tense in verse 12 is the present tense.
The phrase is better translated, “I am presently permitting no woman to teach...” They needed to learn before they could teach.

v. 12 “Not to have authority over a man”
The word Paul uses for authority in this verse is authentein. This word is not found anywhere else in the Bible and is even uncommon in Greek literature.
Paul does not employ the usual Greek word for authority, “exousia”, which is common in the New Testament when referring to authority in the home and church. Instead he chooses a negative word meaning “to dictate or domineer.”
In light of the Greek words chosen, verse 12 is better interpreted, “I am presently permitting no woman to teach in a manner of domineering men”
“Paul does not mean absolute silence, but the kind of teaching in which a woman disregards male leadership which is evident for the home and church throughout Scripture.”

v. 13-15 Adam, Eve, salvation
God made Adam first, and like the women in Ephesus, Eve lacked instruction. They were both were deceived and sinned. God had told Adam first (Gen. 2:15-17), he knew better also.

“She heard what God told Adam concerning the forbidden tree secondhand, and that made her more easily deceived. The women at Ephesus were also lagging behind the men in education. They needed time to learn, and Paul commanded them to learn. Until they did, they also were easily deceived. Eve is an excellent illustration of the Ephesian women who took the initiative and asserted their independence with disastrous results.”

If you’ve spent any time studying the Bible you know that Paul is not talking about, salvation in the sense of sin, repentance, forgiveness, Christ’s death on the cross etc.
If he was, then what about women who are single, or married and don’t have kids?
Most likely means either: Saved through the birth of a child, Jesus. Or that a woman’s greatest achievement is found in her devotion to her divinely ordained role: to help her husband, to bear children, and to follow a faithful life, “appropriate for women who profess to worship God.”
Or, women will be “saved” from the ungodliness Paul is attempting to curb if they return to the “wholesome normalcy of a Christian marriage relationship, within which quietness and submission replace the premature grasp for a role of authority in the church.”
Even that one is questionable though, because not all women get married and can still live lives fully devoted to God.

Conclusion:
Now you know why this is called one of the “problem passages.”
It’s not easy to read, understand or interpret.
I’ll say more about this next week when I conclude this two week series, but I am not pretending to have all the answers here.
This comes from years of study on my part…
Seminary 1992… Book: ”Why not women?” and most recently the document from IBC, from conservative DTS…

A boys life

For all you parents out there, especially you guys with little ones, these are the events of life. Somehow, Elijah has managed to be the King of injuries out of the 5 kids in our house. Last Summer he ended up with 7 stitches in the chin. Two weeks ago he sliced open his thumb and almost required stitches and then a couple of days ago he flew off the front of a skateboard (with a little unwanted help from a brother) and popped his head open requiring 7 stitches.

The last photo is of Micah who insisted on wearing a band aid in the same place as Elijah, even though he had no injury.

The worst thing about getting stitches? Waiting 5 hours in the Emergency room!

(If you are really into gory details, you can click on the photo's for a close up of the cuts.)

Somewhat of a living legend

Okay, so if you are not impressed by the massively huge waves Laird gets towed into at Jaws, the nearly impossible to believe wave he got at Teahupo'o (http://www.kewego.co.uk/video/iLyROoaftL5Q.html) or his all around waterman skills and lifestyle, I'd like you to think about his endorsement of a very good and very affordable lines of clothes at Steve and Barry's.

I'd never even heard of the store until last Saturday morning. I was reading the business section of our paper and came across a great article in the Union Tribune (I'll post it at the end of this post.) I encourage you to read it. Way to go Laird for shunning the corporate monster of the surf world. I bought a shirt that is quality and looks great. The surf trunks from his line of clothing are easily as good as the ridiculously priced $50.00 ones at most surf shops.

Laird was very personable at the store signing. He was kind to each of my kids, patiently asking how to spell each of their names and after a handshake and learning that I had five kids, told me I was "the pro" when it came to parenting. Nice to meet a living legend who seems to be quite down to earth.

Maverick surfing icon Laird Hamilton shuns apparel big shots, teams up his clothing line with low-cost retailer Steve & Barry's
By Jennifer Davies
UNION-TRIBUNE STAFF WRITER
May 17, 2008
When renowned extreme surfer Laird Hamilton decided to do his own clothing line, he didn't sign up with an action sports apparel powerhouse such as Quiksilver, Volcom or Hurley. Instead Hamilton has decided to pair up with Steve & Barry's, a retailer that has made a name for itself by providing incredibly low-cost shoes and apparel. For a limited time, everything in the store costs less than $9, from jeans to T-shirts to sneakers to dresses as well as Hamilton's new Wonderwall collection of surf-inspired shorts and shirts.
It might seem an unlikely collaboration. The action sports industry usually focuses on what is “core” or has street credibility, and Steve & Barry's is hardly akin to a local surf shop. The chain started out selling college branded T-shirts at cut-rate prices in 1985 and now has 266 stores in 38 states, including two in San Diego County.
But Hamilton said the partnership meshes perfectly with his maverick philosophy – he never participated in surfing competitions because he thought it was impossible to judge the art of surfing – and his background. Hamilton, an icon in the surf business, is known for his death-defying rides of 70-foot waves, as well as for his high-profile marriage to Gabrielle Reece, a former pro volleyball player and model.
Coming from humble beginnings in Hawaii where his parents could only buy a couple of pairs of pants and shirts each school year, Hamilton said Steve & Barry's low-cost ethos also appealed to him. He sees the chain as a leader in teaching consumers about what clothes should cost, decrying $125 sneakers or $50 board shorts.
“A lot of things are just so falsely inflated,” Hamilton said. “They (retailers) are charging three, four, five times what it actually costs to make and who eats that? The customer.” For Steve & Barry's part, the company knew it wanted to be a part of the lucrative surf/skate market, which rakes in more than $11 billion a year in the United States alone according to BoardTrac, a market research firm.
Howard Schacter, Steve & Barry's chief partnership officer, said that when it was thinking of a face for a new action sports brand, Hamilton was the obvious choice because of his reputation and name recognition.
Key to the company's strategy is to work with celebrities such as Sarah Jessica Parker, Venus Williams and basketball star Stephon Marbury to appeal to important market segments as well as attract attention. As part of its cost-saving strategy, the company doesn't advertise and relies on free publicity.
“I'm not sure we'd be getting on Access Hollywood if Laird wasn't involved,” Schacter said of some of the publicity the line has garnered.
To promote the new line, Hamilton will be signing autographs at the Steve & Barry's in Horton Plaza starting at noon today.
Marie Case, managing director of BoardTrac, said Hamilton makes sense because he is so well-known in surfing circles and beyond.
“It's a good strategy by the company to bring in someone like him who has such broad appeal,” she said.
Still, it is unclear how Hamilton's reputation will translate into sales. Surfers and skaters who put a lot of stock in staying authentic might not be drawn to Steve & Barry's, which carries a smorgasbord of fashion niches from urban-inspired wear from Marbury's Starbury line to the more mature female fashions of Parker's Bitten brand.
Schacter said Steve & Barry's wants to appeal to everyone in the family, much like a department store. He said the Wonderwall line is not necessarily directed at only action sports enthusiasts, pointing to the strength of Hollister, a surf-inspired retailer based in Ohio that is scoffed at by many in the action sports business.
“It's more aspirational than anything else,” he said of Wonderwall's appeal.
Hamilton said the whole core issue is nonsense.
“The whole thing about being core or not being core is all about insecurity,” he said.
What will matter to customers of Wonderwall, the line he helped design, is the clothes themselves.
“The bottom line is you are talking about a good quality product, and that crosses all boundaries,” he said. At the Horton Plaza store on Thursday, most of those checking out the Wonderwall line hadn't heard of Hamilton before and said the price is what attracted them to the garments.
Perusing the Wonderwall line, Wayne Schwartz, 60, said he's a regular at Steve & Barry's.
“I take pride in telling all my friends who buy the expensive stuff how little I pay,” he said.
Schacter said the company is all about squeezing out any extra cost in the business, from having the clothes made in Chinese factories at off-peak times to having bare-bone offices to flying coach and staying at inexpensive hotels. All of those measures make it possible for Steve & Barry's to make a razor-thin profit.
Schacter said the company has been able to expand rapidly during an economic downturn because more people are looking for bargains.
“Affordable is cool right now,” he said.

Bus fun

Last Saturday I had the opportunity to help out
some friends with the new church plant in Allied Gardens. One of the fun things about having a bus like mine is that it can be an instant parade float. We've used it for years in the PB Christmas Parade and the OB Christmas Parade. Last Saturday we decorated the bus and drove it through the parade route while about 15 volunteers passed out flyers for the church. We also threw out 40 beach balls which was a hit for the kids along the parade route. Now we just need to pray for this new church plant starting in the Fall. In particular please pray for Joey White and John Worcester as the head up the launch effort.

The little ones

Micah has learned to pray by watching all of us. One of the best times of the day is our family prayer time after dinner. When it's his turn to pray, Micah loves to and we recognize his broken language and know he is praying for Mom, Zach and LilyAnna. Very cool and I know God hears his little prayers.

Good fun watching LilyAnna learn to walk. Once she lets go of the prop and tries it on her own, she will exhibit the classic "drunken Frankenstein" walk they all did in the early phases. I'll try to get that on video too.

Spidey tattoo

Most of you know I'm into Spiderman so I decided to go all out and get this tattoo. Pretty realistic looking huh?
Actually...I'm a huge Spiderman fan, but that is not my tattoo. However, that is a real tattoo on a guys chest and arms. Now that is dedication to the web slinger! You gotta give props to the tattoo artist, it really looks like the guys skin is tearing away to reveal a Spiderman costume beneath. I printed out a picture of this and will add it to my collection as one of the more interesting items.

Heat wave

This last weekend was like summer in April. I believe it was close to 90 here in Clairemont. It was actually too hot. Needless to say we did a lot of swimming. My boys spent over 6 hours in the pool on Saturday. That was groovy and all, until we came inside and saw the sunburns. Ooops, forgot the sunblock on April 12th! This video was shot a on April 14th. Micah does well with the arm-floaty-things. His older brothers "help" him in the pool. Good fun.

The War

Kel and I watched "In the Valley of Elah" last week. It was hard to watch, a sobering wake-up call to the cost of the troops after they get home from the war.

Or if you want a tally of what the war costs daily and what we could be spending that money on, take a look at this clip:
http://www.afsc.org/cost/default.htm

I am deeply troubled by the Iraq war and the innumerable side effects is has and will cause throughout the world. Every war sucks, but this one certainly hits home for our generation.

Any thoughts?

Restart

These last two weeks at Coastlands have been fun and exciting. We had a great Easter with some crazy-warm weather. The kiddos went nuts chasing down the Easter eggs and we all got to meet each other out on the playground. What a great way to celebrate the resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ. It was fun to meet lots of new people as Easter was the official "grand opening" of our church in the new school. I look forward to meeting many other new people with the rest of the special events we have lined up for April.


This past Sunday was also a great day for us. Mikey (pictured) from Rock 105.3 came and did a great job sharing his life story. We need to continue to pray for him as he has such a great chance to share his faith with a largely secular audience.

I also want to take this chance to welcome all the new families to our church. We are a family friendly church in that we really care about dads, moms and kids. We believe that our job as the church is to help equip the parents to be the primary spiritual influence in their kids lives. We welcome kids in our service and also understand if parents need to put their kids in one of the classrooms during church. Somehow we'd like to strike a balance between allowing families to worship together for the entire worship service, yet also be understanding and kind to those families who are still learning how to do that. Please be patient with us as we are learning how to do this in the new school. I'll post some thoughts here on this subject that you can also find in a nifty flyer on the back tables at church.

I'd love to hear your feedback, especially some of you newer people to our church as we all learn together through this process.

Children in Worship: A guide for the congregation: Join us in welcoming the children as they share in worship.

A message to our entire church…
Families are an important part of our church community. We love children at Coastlands Church and very much desire for them to be a part of our faith community. In fact, we believe that spiritual formation for all of us happens best in community. At our worship gatherings our intention is to create an atmosphere that is conducive for children’s spiritual formation. We invite any family to have their children join them for the entire worship service. Yes, it may get a little noisy at times or we may hear babies crying, but we have a hard time believing that Jesus was “annoyed” with the children when he said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matt. 19:14)

Let’s not forget the commitment we made to our children at the time of their dedication. We promised to raise our children in the ways of the Lord with the help of our church family.

You can welcome children in our midst in the following way…
Ø Greet them along with the adults.
Ø Invite a child with whom you are acquainted with to sit with you during the worship service.
Ø Ensure that children who read have a bulletin of their own.
Ø Share a Bible with a child sitting next to you.
Ø Allow children to participate in the service, dancing and having fun during the singing.
Ø Be understanding if a parent needs to leave with a child.
Ø Be willing to offer help to a family if they need it.
Ø Have patience with the children and the adults bringing them, they are learning.
Ø Remember we are all children of God!

Children are special in God’s eyes! This is evident throughout scripture. In Mark 10:16 we read that Jesus took the children in his arms, put his hands of them and blessed them.

Parents…
We applaud you for taking this step. As a congregation we want to support and encourage you as you share in this time of worship with your child by your side. Here are a few suggestions as you begin this process…

Ø Children learn from example. It is vital that your children witness you participating in corporate worship.
Ø We encourage parents to keep children of all ages in the worship service for the opening set of songs and children’s sermon time.
Ø After the children’s sermon, the children can either go back and sit with their parents or follow the others to the classrooms.
Ø Prepare your child ahead of time. Let them know what to expect and what you expect from them.
Ø Arrive early. Remind them of what happens during the service, when to listen, when to speak, when to sit and when to stand.
Ø You may want to sit near the front where it’s easier to see and hear.
Ø We also have an area in the back with carpet if you’d like to sit with your little ones so they can crawl around some.
Ø Introduce your children to those sitting near you.
Ø If possible, seat children next to an adult who can help guide and assist them throughout the service.
Ø If you need to step out to calm an upset child, please feel free to do so through the back exits, but please return.

Worship in many ways is like a family meal. Individuals in a family sometimes can, and sometimes do, eat separately. However, there is a deeper enjoyment in a meal when we share in the meal together as a family.

Likewise, we worship independently at times and it is important to worship spontaneously at any place. But if we never worship as one body with all of the family together, we miss the depth of love between the members that grows in community worship.

There is evidence that people who do not worship with the entire body of Christ as children feel a lack of belonging to the faith community as they become adults. However, people who grow up feeling a part of the total family of God in worship continue to be actively involved in their spiritual lives throughout their adult years.

We welcome you to the Lord’s house. We are glad you joined us today and pray that your life will be touched by the Almighty God through this time of worship.

Coastlands Church also offers these programs for children during the worship service:
Nursery up to age 2 is offered in room 403.
Toddler/Preschool up through age 4 is also offered in room 403. The children have a time of play, music and a short lesson.
Elementary age from 5-10 is offered in room 404. In this setting the children have a lesson time, crafts, singing and prayer.

Upper Elementary age 10 and up are encouraged to either sit with their parents and learn to understand the entire worship service or they can go into the lower Elementary class and be a helper.

If your children do go into the classrooms, please pick them up as soon as you can after the worship service. That will allow our volunteer helpers in the children’s ministry to come out and socialize too!

Holy Week

This Sunday is Palm Sunday and it also kicks off Holy Week. I consider Easter to be the "Super Bowl" of the Christian year. I'm always amazed at the turnout at even our small church for Easter. I find it a bit challenging to preach a fresh sermon every year for Palm Sunday and Easter. It's super important that we tell the same story every year, but I pray for God's insight as I share what he has taught me in my study of the Word.

What does Holy Week mean to you all? What are some of your favorite memories of Easter? How do you keep it fresh each year?

For all you chess fans out there, here is a video I found. I am going to use it as an intro to the sermon on Sunday. It has to do with Palm Sunday and the donkey. See if you can figure out where I'm going with this before you here it live in church.

Big time miracle

You gotta love this picture. I showed it in church on Sunday while preaching on John 6:1-15. This is one of the more well known miracles of the NT, in fact, it's the only one mentioned in all four gospels.

I'd love to hear your comments on this picture as well as the story of the feeding of the 5000.

How have you seen God provide in your life? How has God surprised you in the methods he has used to give you what you need? In what ways have you been "forced" to trust God when it seems like you own methods aren't working? Has there been times when God didn't provide what you asked for, yet you still learned from that experience?

The neutral zone

In church on Sunday, I preached on one of my favorite passages, John 4. It's a great story of how Jesus met this woman at Jacob's well. He had love and compassion for her and set a great example for us.

We discussed this story further at our home fellowship on Tuesday night. Basically we agreed that the "neutral zone" that Jesus met her at is really anywhere we go as Christians. The presence of Jesus should be seen in us wherever we go. We should be asking God for opportunities everyday to turn the conversation to deeper spiritual matters.

Any examples of how you all have been able to do that? I think it's great when we can talk about God, Jesus etc. with people before they ever come to our churches.

Kids in church

(Ok, so the picture of Jesus is a bit cheesy, but you get the point, he loved spending time with children...)

As we move forward with our church getting ready to restart and replant Coastlands in a new school, we are rethinking how we do the children's ministry. I'd like to move in the direction of having both a nursery, toddler and lower elementary class available, while also allowing families to keep thier kids in church if they'd like to. We are still in process, but these articles by Scott Brown shed a good light on the subject of keeping your kids in church, if you so choose. I'd love to hear your comments and thoughts.

The Value of Children Worshiping with their Parents in
Church
By Scott Brown
First of all, it should strike as strange that we even would take up this subject. Of course, children should be with their parents in the meetings of the church. But in this era, children are almost always hustled away from worship with adults into high energy activities geared to their inclinations.
So the question for consideration here is, if you make the jump and engage your children in worship and teaching (that is usually geared only for adults) what would be the value?

What follows are my own observations. I do not have any statistics or passages of
scripture to prove any of it. These are the most obvious effects that I have observed.
Here are four value-adding results of our bringing our families together for worship

1. It Fosters Closeness:
Bringing the whole family together for worship, prayer and instruction will enhance the
unity love and effectiveness as a team for spreading the glory of God.
Anytime people spend time together, it fosters closeness. This is just a fact of life and it
applies to retreats with your company team members or anything. Meeting together in
the church will do the same thing to foster closeness. When we are together, our hearts
turn toward one another.
At the same time, this should not make families islands, but it should bring them into rich
relationship with the family of God. We come to the gathering of the church to link arms
with the wider family of God. It would betray a deep unhealthiness if the families were
closed societies.
But, people I know who have broken rank to worship with their children, report that there
is more love in the family as a result.

2. It places parents at center stage of spiritual development:
The value for the parents will be that it will place them in center stage of the child’s
spiritual growth. All family members will hear the same thing together and the parents
will be in better position to explain, ask questions and provide practical applications.
It also helps parents understand areas in which the child needs instruction. Being
together in this setting will:
* Bring obedience problems to the surface
* Bring broken relationship problems between parents and children to the surface
All of these things will tend to help the children learn to look to the head of the household
for ongoing instruction in God’s Word.

3. It Accelerates Skill Development:
This is an opportunity to teach your children some valuable skills that will accelerate
their maturity.
There are several things that they will have the opportunity to learn in the process:
How to listen for life changing truth in a lecture setting
How to take notes and share about what was learned
How to honor the speaker by:
* Sitting still
* Keeping eye contact with the speaker
* Honoring the other listeners by refraining from disruptive and selfish
behavior like whispering, wandering around the room, squirming and
whining.

4. It accelerates maturity.
With parents helping children in the above areas, maturity is accelerated. There are many
development oriented experiences that could be mentioned. Here are a few:
Honoring the preaching of God’s Word and participating personally in its life
changing message.
Early exposure to advanced vocabulary
Early exposure to advanced theological concepts
After incorporating children into the normal life of the church for several years now, I
have had the opportunity to see first hand what happens. Early maturity and enhanced
love is the result. I don’t believe that most people would name these as results of the
modern age graded Sunday school.

What Can Children Get out of Church?
By Scott Brown
There is no indication from scripture that children were ever removed from the meetings
designed for preaching scripture reading, prayer and worship. But, in our culture, it is
automatic and comprehensive. Jeremy Walker has observed,
“The constant presumption of Scripture is that children were present in the
worship of the people of God. In Nehemiah's time, men and women and all those
who could hear with understanding gathered to hear Ezra the scribe read the Law
(Neh 8.1-3; Ezr 10.1). Moses certainly anticipated the literal 'children' of Israel to
be present when the Law was read (Dt 31.12-13). Paul's letters, intended to be
read to the churches, assume the intelligent presence of children (Eph 6.1-4; Col
3.20), and children were present when the Lord Jesus taught (Mt 18.1-5; 19.13-
15).”

What effect does worship singing have on a child?
First of all, it must be said that children get something out of everything they experience.
So we should abandon the idea that “my child gets nothing out of big church.” This is
subterfuge and misinformation. Plus, nobody gets everything out of anything,
particularly a sermon.
We may say, “our children don’t get anything out of the services,” but we can’t really
believe it. We get goose bumps when we sing to our children while they are in the
womb. We believe that the sounds and even the attitudes surrounding them are affecting
their development process. Some people play classical music to their children in the
womb, while others contend that just hearing it makes their kids smarter outside the
womb. We take them to the library and they do not get everything out of what is there.
They listen to all of our conversation, and don’t think for a minute that everything goes
over their heads.

Children get something out of everything they experience.
There is great value for a very young child experiencing the deep and authentic worship
of the church.
Something is being transferred as they watch their fathers give of the family resources
during the offering. As they grow up their understanding will increase.
Something is being transferred, as they watch the adults ‘worship in spirit and in truth”
John 4:23.
They don’t get everything but they can get something from observing the fervency and
genuineness of the church’s expression of love for God, dependence upon Him and joy in
Him.
Children progressively understand what a parent and the wider church members love and
appreciate. Year after year, their understanding builds. Year after year the well is filling
up.

What effect does the teaching of the Word have on a child?
By joining in the main services they will be experiencing the teaching of God’s Word and
beginning to understand the importance of preaching. This is a perfect opportunity for a
father to share with his children how the preaching of the Word is affecting him and how
he plans to bring his family in line with it.
Only God knows what a child gets from hearing father pray.
Only God knows what a child gets out of hearing God’s people worship.
Only God knows what a child gets out of seeing men standing up and speaking of the
things of God.
Only God knows what a child gets out of experiencing Christian community.
It is really much simpler than you might think. The attitude should be: the church is
family time. Our family, and the family of God.
We enjoy eating out together as a family. We enjoy going to the beach together as a
family. Then, why do we not enjoy worship and instruction and fellowship with our
brothers and sisters? One reason is that it is culturally odd and it is difficult to resist the
direction of culture of excluding children. At many points, the church must be separate
from its culture to maintain its faithfulness to God. This means that difficulties will
present themselves as we resist

Steps for the Preparation of children:
The first thing that must be in order to bring your children into the main worship services
of the church is to examine your own heart. Do you find pleasure in hearing the Word of
God and turning your heart toward Him in the corporate worship service.
Do you yearn for the courts of the Lord? Do you hunger and thirst after God and His
Word?
So, when should you bring your children into the main service? As soon as you
personally love the Lord with all your heart.
If you do not love the worship and the preaching, you will no doubt raise up another of
your own kind.
A husband and wife came to our elders once to say that their children were not getting
anything out of the services and they were going to leave the church. Both of them told
of how boring and dead and irrelevant church was to them as children, when their parents
forced them to go. I asked, “were your fathers regenerate? They said “no”, they did not
think so. This is the legacy of parents who make their children to go to church when they
themselves have no relationship with Him. I believe that they thought church was
irrelevant, because their father thought it was irrelevant. If your chief delight is not in the
worship of God and Word of God, you will no doubt create more problems than you will
solve.

Second, you must teach your children that it is ok if they do not understand everything.
Life is built one building block at a time and it takes much time. The child raising
experience is marathon of accumulation. Each day something is added.
Every valuable activity in life is not the exciting rush of activity that you find in our
incredible movie entertainment products. Some legitimate activities are exciting and
some are not. It is healthy, in a sense, “to be bored.” It is good for them as it strengthens
them in another area: honor for parents and others around them.
It will strengthen their ability to wait patiently while not being entertained, and it helps
them break addiction to entertainment.
It lengthens their attention span and the ability to sustain energy under the hearing of
discourses with demanding logical progressions.
Third, keep a routine of methods. Here are some ideas for keeping your children with
you in church.
The night before the service, look at the text to be preached and look for images or
objects that could relate to what is there. Try to find an object to bring to church with
you that will help the very young child to understand the content.
If you have older children, instruct them to have sensitivity to the mothers with very
young children who may need help.
Give the children some guidelines: no potty breaks, no drinks of water or wandering
around, no running in the meeting place of the worship time, no getting on the platform.
For very young children, bring a blanket and have them sit on it on the floor during the
service and give them something to draw with or play quietly. This will also give them a
footprint upon which they can be instructed to stay. This could also be practiced at home
for a successful experience in church.
I am not in favor of giving children coloring books and distractions to keep them
occupied. It is better to bring their attention to true worship of God.
Bring a small chair for the small child.
Third, prepare yourself for the long haul view. This is not an Instant Gratification Affair.
It takes significant time and effort to shape the heart and behavior of a child to the place
where they are well behaved and participating in the services. A few Sundays will not be
enough to train them to be active listeners and participants in worship. It takes many
weeks, months and years and is an ongoing process.
Ages 1-4 are the most difficult ages since children are more squirmy and ‘attention
spans” are shorter. These years require constant coaching and vigilance. It could drive the
most godly parent to church hopping, drink or homicide. But remember, you are
preparing them for the future and the front end investment, though it is the most difficult
is worth the return.
Training children is like building a new company. It is harder at the beginning and
severely taxes almost everything you have. But, if you are diligent on the front end,
rewards await.

Fourth, plan what you will do during the service.
One of my favorite things to do with my children who are beginning to learn how to
write is to have them look at my notes as I write them. I tell them to copy the words I
have underlined on my page. They have difficulty keeping up with everything I write in
my notes, but if I underline a few key ideas, they will understand some of the really
important points.
Use tools to help the child keep focus
Use a “fill in the blank” outline
Play a word identification game – We list key words to be used in the sermon on
the sermon outline sheet
Vocabulary builder – have the child write down words they do not understand. It
is also wise to have the parent write down words that the child should learn.
Use a “picture it” outline for very young children. In our church, we provide a
sheet with key ideas in the outline so the student can draw a picture of the idea
being presented. Even if you do not have a prepared sheet like this, a blank one
will work.
If your children are being disobedient or dishonoring, feel free to take them out of the
service to deal with the heart issues that have created it.

What can children get out of church?
The question would be a strange one for people in 1800 since they always had their
children with them during worship. It was normal. The question would not have come
up because people were used to keeping their children with them.
The question would also have been an unusual one for people in the early church. The
early church met in homes with all present and Jesus made it clear to His disciples that
children were always welcome.
The question would be a strange one for people in Israel. We have many Old Testament
references that record children present during major events where God’s Word was being
communicated to groups of people. The Old Testament writers make mention of this
without interpretation.
It is obvious that the normative practice for Israel and the early church was to integrate
children into the normal practices of the gatherings of the people. Nowhere do we find a
trace of teaching or example of our modern age graded approach to the church.